I had the privilege this evening of facilitating a meeting by zoom that was the closest to  becoming a role model for social and cultural meetings including committee meetings

This was about dowsing and was a spin off from a rather inappropriate group organised by the British Society of Dowsers a few months ago. I have been a member of the BSD on and off for ages and have done dowsing since I was in my late 20s and it has become a part of my life. I earned my living at it for many years. I do personal relationships and chakra balancing.

The meeting started on a unfortunate technical note. I tested my microphone and speaker just before the meeting as I usually do but the microphone settings had somehow adjusted themselves and I was not able as chairperson to make myself heard so fortunately Francoise was already on the call so I had to improvise and jump over and run the meeting from another screen.

I always ask everyone how they are and this is a means of helping everyone to tune in to the meeting and see people as human beings not just as moving images on a screen. One member had attended a day conference in Australia and he was able to report the details of the meeting including one involving the memory of water. We were asked to bring a glass of water and we used dowsing to inquire of the purity of the water and then inquired when it had been in the original pure state in terms of the number of years.

We then directed our energy to purify the water if indeed it was below part.   We associate blessing either with the Roman Catholic church or with primitive societies but we do have a huge amount of psychic, telepathic or natural gifts that we are not using because we are not encouraged to use it and also we are never taught about it.

So much for the education system which in England anyway,  is looking less like an education system as the years go on and more like a programming system. If I had a child I would definitely educate them at home or take them to a Rudolph Steiner School.

I decided we would make Christmas presents for each other, virtual presents, and invite anyone who had a problem or questions to bring it forward so we could all do a dowsing.

Someone asked if it was a good thing that they accept a six-month promotion to take the place of the boss who had resigned. Was she up to it? What would happen if at the end of the task she became unemployed when a new person was appointed. We discussed the question at length and asked for further and better particulars and in the end we agreed that she really wanted to do this anyway and just wanted a little bit of push and encouragement to actually say yes.

Someone else told us that touching the story of a man from North London who was living in a hostel. He had to move every 12 days but to the rules. As a result he had no friends. He made the journey down to Streatham in south London  to speak to our group member because he had no one else to talk to. The clients of the hostels were people with emotional problems, alcoholic problems and drug problems and he did not feel at home with them.

He visited and spent three hours talking and at the end asked how much he owed her. She of course said nothing was owed and it was a pleasure and any time he needed a chat all he had to do was to make a phone call.

Someone else told the story about how they work for older people who have alarms in their homes in case they fall. She loves her job that she’s been in for 35 years and is part of a 24-hour service. She knows some people who are so cautious about troubling anyone that if they fall during the night they wait until 8:00 in the morning so as not too disturb the workers.

Sometimes clients just ring for a chat and this is registered as a testing the alarm service sometimes it’s just need to talk, so important if you have not spoken to anyone for three days.

I just wonder how many millions of people are suffering from loneliness. I remarked that we should give thanks not only for what we have but also for what we have not had to experience. I experienced homelessness when I was in my forties mainly due to the complete ignorance about the social welfare support system but I did have family that I could call on. Some people have no one.

The mind set we are competing with

I asked people in our little group what they were going to do over Christmas. I started the ball rolling by saying that I do not have particularly good memories of the Christmas period.  I came out with the story of when I was at home as a young man when we had Christmas lunch when no one said a single word so this is the time where traditionally I can feel a bit down.

This year we are going to spend Christmas with my sister who lives in Croydon and we shall probably have a quiet time listening to music, watching the odd bit of television, and reading a couple of books that I have been meaning to read for some time.

A member spoke about the time when her parents separated when she was young and each parent was jealous of the others attention to her so if she went to one parent the other parent complained. She got over it by traveling widely over this period including a trip to Asia.

I hoped that everyone would have a good holiday period and that they take full advantage of the. Between the week before Christmas and Twixmas, the following week, when no one expects you to be available or be on duty leaving you to focus on other matters. In my case I have a mountain of DVDs and CDs which I will probably never listen to so I can go through and have a grand sort out.

We tend to forget the  healing power of music and at this time of year I really must listen to BBC Radio 3 with its unceasing pouring out of seasonal music. I admit I watch too much television and not enough radio because there is quality out there and when you hear a good program you realize how trivial other media can be.

“Music can heal the wounds which medicine cannot touch”

“Music has the power to heal, transform and inspire and we have the power through deep listening to increase our intuition and self awareness.”

What was it about this meeting that made it so pleasant and productive? This was the sixth meeting in a series. It does take time for a group to gel and get to know each other so that people can be more relaxed and say what they think. Who wants to be judged by someone that you hardly know? Added to that was the jolly pre-Christmas period which even in this dreadful age holds good memories for many of us in the slightly older age group.

I pride myself on giving everyone a chance to speak and be heard. This time there were nine of us and that was about right. Aesthetically I like to see a three by three presentation on my TV screen.

too messy for me

I definitely do not like ZOOM ‘groups’ of say 50 or 100 people. The images are small and cover many screens, I’m sure that the majority of people who would like to say something are a bit intimidated because of the numbers of people and it reminds me more of a football crowd than a group.  The screen can be a distraction when people leave the scene, eat, or do something like answer a phone. I prefer speaker mode where the speaker is seen enlarged.

I am dead against having a fixed agenda and fixed expectations. The meeting will have an energy of its own depending on the chemistry of the participants and their motivation.  If a few seconds of silence happens that indicates that people are recomposing themselves for the next phase so, chairman, don’t panic and feel you have to fill in every moment.

We discuss whether we should continue in the future. Every group has its periodicity and it’s viability in terms of length. I have run zoom groups that had lasted for two years and I have run other groups in meetings that have lasted on one occasion and then faded out.

All groups of whatever length perform a service which is cumulative and grows exponentially according to the number of meetings, it’s behooves the host to keep alert, to be prepared, and to keep the  conversation going. Someone mentioned that many other organizations apart from the BSD  are also fading in their appeal and I attributed this to the mass confusion, depression, and stress that people are under but also the quality of leadership.

This may have a business look but the qualities are required in all manner of meetings

Groups of any kind do not work without a leader. It is absolutely vital that the leader of a group reflects the nature and scope of the people who attend the group, adapting as necessary to the micro culture and the mood. Given a chance I would prefer to meet people in person but in such a specialist subject where the percentage of population interested is very small, the amount of travel to and fro would be significant and fewer people would be able to attend. I’m talking about an evening group not a whole day or weekend where travel time is part of the experience.

Summary of key points for running a meeting